Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Special

Recently, my cousin had to go through something that most of us could never imagine. I wasn't sure how to write about it, or even if I should. I tried, but the words just wouldn't translate. My sister put it into the words that I wasn't able to. She wrote it on her MySpace blog, and I wanted to share it with all of you. I hope she doesn't mind.

Taking life for granted

One week ago today, a new family member was born in Texas. Dharma Lucille Drude. 4 lbs, 8 oz, 18 in. long. She was born crying, wiggling, and ready for life. Dharma was a special baby. The first baby for Jennie and Jason, the first grandchild for my Aunt Marilyn, another great grandchild for my grandparents, special. Special. Special because she got to see Jesus before any of us did, special because Heaven is her home now, special because she can crawl up on God’s lap for a hug.

God showed us how special she is when he allowed her to cry, something she was not supposed to be able to do. Special when he helped her squeeze her Mommy’s hand often that day, because she was not supposed to be able to do that, according to modern medicine. But God is greater than any medical book ever written. She was special because her Daddy got to give her a bath and change her diapers, he was not guaranteed that he would even be able to hold her.

Dharma was a gift from Heaven. My cousin and her husband were told during a routine ultrasound that Dharma would be born with Anancephaly, a nonformation of her brain. It was suggested that they have an abortion. Thankfully, they relied on their faith in a God that loved Dharma as she was. No matter that she may have just a few minutes of life after birth, no matter that she might not be perfect.

Dharma is perfect now. Special. Loved by her Mommy and Daddy. Loved by her grandmother Marilyn, loved by Nanny and Daddy Bob. Loved by her cousin Kimmie. Loved by God.

Special.

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23 comments:

Just My Type said...

What a beautiful tribute. Prayers going up.

cyndy said...

Beautifully written. I'm so sorry for your cousin and the family. What a gift to have a short time with her.

Christie said...

WOW! U had already told me that story, but reading it still made me cry. She is special and God is AMAZING!

themommykelly said...

OMG! First off, let me say, yes, that was an absolutely beautiful post and a tremendous tribute to Dharma and her parents. God bless them.

It is uncanny... during our ultrasound yesterday afternoon, my husband and I were asking a million and a half questions of the maternal-fetal MD during his follow up procedure to check our baby's spine. He explained both spina bifida and anacephaly. I was chilled to the bone when he described the second. I just couldn't imagine it! And then, bang here is your post this morning.

Your family is in my prayers.

Irene said...

How sweet, and I am so happy to hear to that they chose to continue on with their pregnancy. And what a gift for them to be able to spend at least a few precious moments with their daughter.

I was in a similar situation 5 years ago. My little Caroline was deemed "not compatible with life". We continued on, but didn't expect to ever take her home. But here she is almost 5 years later. Yes, she has many issues, but yes, she is one of the biggest blessings of my life.

Amy said...

WOW! I am so glad they got to share those moments with their daughter. I love miracles!

Rachel said...

Wow.

Scarlet O'Kara said...

Your sister has a way with words...

Many prayers to your cousin, her husband, and the rest of the family.

Wendi said...

What a beautiful story. Thanks for sharing. My thoughts and prayers are with your family.

Kimmylyn said...

This was a beautiful post, though I sit here sobbing at such pain.

photomommy said...

Thank you for sharing. It's a beautiful story and wonderfully written.

Your family is in my prayers.

Sarah O. said...

So bittersweet. I'm thinking good thoughts for your cousin and extended family.

Amy said...

That is powerful, wonderful and heartbreaking at the same time. My prayers are with you are your cousin.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for all your prayers and kind words. My husband and I thank God everyday for the time we had with Dharma. She was a special baby. We miss her so very much. I think about her all the time. When i see a flower that she would have enjoyed or a pair of shoes she would have looked great in for church. I know she is in God's arms and is loving every minute of it, but we still miss her.

Jennie Drude.....Dharma's mommy

Anonymous said...

I hope Dharma's organs were donated to other infants. In her one day, she could have saved many lives.

Thankfully without a brain stem she was not in pain.

Anonymous said...

We were able to donate enough heart valves to help 4 other babies. That's all you can legally donate when they have anencephaly. Dharma did have a brain stem. It was not exposed. She was not in pain, but she could feel it. Trust me, my baby was NOT a vegetable like most. She could react to anything. She could hear, she did not like taking a bath, and she did not like getting her feet tickled. Don't believe everything you read about a disorder. I did, but God showed me He is bigger than any doctor or science book.

Jennie Drude
Dharma's mommy

Anonymous said...

If your God is bigger than any doctor or "science book", why didn't he complete her brain and allow her to die?

pb&j in a bowl said...

Anonymous- Gee, you are a sweetheart, huh?

Did my cousin and her husband learn through this experience? I'm sure. Did they grow closer to God? I'm sure.

Bad stuff happens- even to great people. That's part of life.

kimmie said...

Anonymous:

You see, God is greater than anything we could ever imagine. God sees the whole picture, not just a small portion like we can. He sees what will happen to these four precious babies that received Dharma's heart valves, He knows what their lives will be like, their children, their grandchildren, etc. He knows how many people Dharma has touched, whether or not they will admit it or not.

Obviously, you were touched, because you would not have commented. God knows. One day, every knee shall bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus is Lord, whether you will admit it now or not. Its up to you. And I'm sure Dharma will be there to see your confession. God bless, and may you find peace in Him.

Just My Type said...

Kimmie, I'm soooo glad you posted before I did. I like your response much better than what my approach would have been.

People who aren't willing to own up to their own words shouldn't be taken seriously

Anonymous said...

You go girls! I have almost had enough of peoples untrue, selfish, and just plain STUPID comments. I hear and read them all the time. Thank GOD for woman like you who are willing to tell others the truth and not hide. God was not picking on me, Jason, or Dharma. His way and reasons are always than better choices.

Yes, I miss my daughter. But look at ALL the people she touched and blessed?

Please pray for whoever left that cruel comment. I'm sure they are lonely and lost. I still pray for Janet. When Christ comes back, I pray she is the first to be on her knees.

Reading the comments my cousins have left lately really has lifted my spirits. Thank you for being a blessing and doing God's work!

Jennie Drude
"Mommy o Dharma Lucille"

Just My Type said...

Jennie- I'll be thinking of you this Mother's day. I hope you find a way to celebrate that brings you comfort and joy. I don't know if Dharma was your first child but you are most certainly deserving to be honored on this Mother's day and all that follow.

Jennie Drude ~Dharma's Mommy~ said...

Yep, Dharma was my first baby. I am excited to have my first Mother's Day, but I know it will be hard. It sounds weird, but church is the HARDEST place to go sense Dharma passed away. I still go, but I cry on and off the whole time. Here is a link to Dharma's website, for those of you who want to see what my angel looked like.

http://www.babyjellybeans.com/web/do/site/home?ID=336292

Thank you again Just my Type...

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